5.25pm
Friday
29 April 2005
Peut-être l'amour est le processus de mener
vous doucement de nouveau à vous-même.
Antoine de Saint-Exupery
I think the biggest problem with having big (but specific) dreams and being motivated about my life is that it totally opens up the floodgates of frustration and disappointment. I've been so solely devoted to my own enjoyment of life in the year and a half since the painful and horrific end of my engagement that I've eschewed anything that might make me unhappy. Pretty cool boy have the potential to disappoint me or make me angry? CUT HIM OFF. Devotion to my job leading to the realization that I'm not as good at it as I thought? BE A SLACKER. Stop enjoying art class when it gets technical and less intuitive? STOP GOING AND DON'T EVEN FEEL BAD ABOUT IT FOR A SECOND. But I'm still drawing and painting, which is still fun, for the most part. Wish me luck with my computer being fun for the most part; I think I'm going to work on it this weekend.
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New news on my potential location this fall? Found a program at the Sorbonne that I'm interested that might let me start that soon. Sent off for an application today. Talked en français un peu this afternoon with a visiting engineer we had from Tunisia. My contributions to the conversation were limited primarily to "Do you like America?" and "I like ice cream" (we were having a birthday celebration with ICE CREAM in the office) but I felt pretty pleased with my ability to comprehend the majority of the things that he said, as that was shockingly difficult when I was in Paris and they would talk at me with great speed and blur.
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I have about eight different possible plans for tonight, but very few things on the agenda for Saturday and Sunday, and I'm looking forward to cuddling in my bed for hours and hours and finishing my grown-up Harry Potter book. A lot of the reviewers get uppity and complain that the novel is "so much more" than just Harry for Adults, but the logistics of making magic a somewhat believable subject in modern-day England really can only be varied by so much. Certainly Susanna is more mystic, erudite, agile with her large vocabulary, but I suspect the people who concocted their snide remarks w.r.t. Ms. Rowling are under the impression that her books are without meaningful plotlines and sophisticated allusions because they are for children, but I think children have a better sense sometimes for allusion than adults, even if they don't know the exact definition of "imperious" or "pabulum."