12 April 2006
The truth was that they both played a game, mythical and perverse, but for all that comforting: it was one of the many dangerous pleasures of domestic love.
Gabriel García Márquez, Love in the Time of Cholera
I feel like the sign says, "If you are lost" and then nothing else, gaping and deliberate. Like a sentence whose meaning is dictated not only in the words but also in the spaces between them, my life composed in its weary bouts of silence.
The other day a friend of mine was walking past a homeless man on the street who looked up at him and pleadingly asked, "Change?"
My friend was taken aback a moment and earnestly responded "I'm trying," before he realized that the man was asking for spare change.
I've been on go go go since the last entry over a week ago, what with a 40 Watt show a tray of eggplant parmigiana a trip to Savannah packing unpacking lots of work talking walking stupid schmoozing trying to pay my taxes trying to gather some sense of ground trying to make the rest of my life make as much sense as it does when I'm lying down next to my favorite.
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Biggest best news: Elena will be here in Atlanta on May 8th, for good or at least for now and this summer is anticipated to fulfill all my wildest dreams and fantasies of Georgia for at least the next year.
Other: I have a bump on my temple and it's red and sore. Matt Jaehn got his phone stolen and wants you to call him. I've never felt so reinvigorated by a day of sitting at my desk as I have today. Fortune magazine laid out their top 50 jobs this week, and software engineer is number 1 and professor is number 2 (have I told you yet I want to get my PhD and be a teacher?), so I guess I'm living the dream. The drug war makes me sick. I'm going to MJQ tonight and want you to come with me. I've almost completely given up on make-up for the day-to-day and I've got more to say about that, but am worried it's excessively self-absorbed. (me: it's weird to see my face all the time lately, not covered up bo: well, you have a pretty face me: ...I think I knew that) I finally told my boss that I probably will be moving to NYC in four or five months, and even though I told him it wasn't 100% certain yet, now it feels like it is.